Give Referrals to Others First

BNI sums it up with its two-word mantra: Givers Gain. If you are networking for business, the purpose is to get referrals. But the best thing you can do is not to ask for business referrals, but to give them out instead. It is the law of reciprocity. Give and give generously, without thinking of any return, and the likelihood is that you will receive.

Why give to others first? It’s all about building trust and deepening the relationships you have with the connections in your network. By giving to others first you take the initial step of building two-way, win-win networking relationships. You are being proactive and positive. You are leading by example and modelling the behaviour that you hope others will adopt. More often than not, they will.

How do you give a good referral? Begin by recognising the immense value locked up in your network. You are a gatekeeper to a resource bank of talents, skills and knowledge, and you hold the key! Think about what this means—for you, for your network and for people you haven’t even met yet.

You often hear people talk about their problems. In recent weeks (in the UK) you might have heard people grumbling about problems caused by the cold: heating stopped working, pipes frozen, car would not start, etc. Or they are complaining about getting their tax return in by 31 January. These statements are the opportunities for you to do good in someone else’s life and to help solve their problem. You may not have the skills, or the desire, to fix the plumbing or complete a tax return, but you probably know someone who does! That’s the referral you should be giving. All it takes is listening.

You are probably familiar with another two-word mantra: Be Prepared! Be ready, so that when you hear about a problem that someone in your network can solve, you can tell them about your colleague’s business, and hand them a business card.

Action this week! Become prepared to give referrals. Go out and buy a business card wallet or carrier. Better, go out and buy three. Fill each of them with at least three business cards of each of the people in your primary network, the members of your word-of-mouth marketing team. Keep one in your car, one in your briefcase and one on your desk. If you haven’t already done so, schedule 1-to-1 meetings with each person in your card holder. Then you will be ready to respond whenever a referral opportunity comes up.

This article is similar to an educational talk I gave at a BNI Premier networking breakfast. It is based on material in The 29% Solution by Ivan Misner.