Ask Your Own Questions

If you have been following this series of networking tips, you will have profiled your preferred client and figured out how to meet the right people. You are in front of such a person, perhaps engaged in a 1-to-1 meeting. Now what? You ask the questions you would like asked of you.

Meeting a new contact is great, but you need to turn them from a mere contact into a connection. You need to deepen your relationship by getting to know each other, like each other and trust each other, and a great way to do that is to let the law of reciprocity work for you. Make the effort first to listen and learn about the other party by asking good questions, and—here’s the clever bit—ask questions that you would like to have asked back at you.

In all relationship building there is an element of reciprocity. BNI captures this well with its mantra: Givers Gain. Reciprocity works really well in conversations. If you want someone to ask you a specific question, ask it of her first. She will think, “That’s a great question,” and more than likely, after she has answered, she will ask it back in return. (Of course she might not, and then you must decide if she is an “all about me” person—someone you want to avoid.)

Great questions to deepen your knowledge of the other person’s business, and for them to learn more about you, include:

• What do you do?
• Who is your target market?
• What do you most like about what you do?
• What’s new in your business?
• What’s the biggest challenge for you and your business?
• What sets you apart from your competition?
• Why did you start your business?
• Where is your business located?
• What’s your most popular product?
• How do you generate most of your business?

A truly great question, suggested by Bob Burg in his book Endless Referrals, is: “How do I know if someone I am talking to is a good prospect for you?”

It’s a great question because it sets you apart from the pack. It is a question most people do not ask. And it demonstrates one of the traits of a master networker: helpfulness. It is also, I suggest, a question you would really like to answer for yourself.

Action this week! Take the initiative and ask these questions of each person you meet. You will 1) find out if the person is someone you want to know better; 2) you will offer support to him rather than trying to sell to him; and 3) you will give yourself opportunities to network you and your business more effectively.

Of course, before you ask each question, be sure to have a fantastic answer for it yourself!

What other great questions would you add to the list above?

This article is similar to an educational talk I gave at a BNI Premier networking breakfast. It is based on material in The 29% Solution by Ivan Misner.