Hold Effective 1-to-1 Meetings

If you have met the right person, someone who can put you in front of your preferred clients, how do you turn them from a mere contact into a connection? You need to deepen your relationship by getting to know each other, like each other and trust each other. To do that you need to go 1-to-1.

What is a 1-to-1? Simply, it’s a meeting, in person, between two networkers to deepen the understanding between them in order to foster a better business relationship. I want to offer four suggestions for successful a 1-to-1 meeting.

The first is knowing who the 1-to-1 is about. If you ask someone for a 1-to-1, then the focus of your meeting is the other person, not you. You ask in order to learn how to give business referrals to that other person, not how to get them. Give before seeking to gain. You may have time in your 1-to-1 meeting to reverse roles and focus on you, but if that doesn’t happen, it is still a successful meeting. Of course, if someone asks you for a 1-to-1, then you’re in the spotlight. If nobody asks you, you may want to look again at how you present yourself and your business, ... or buy a new deodorant!

The second suggestion is to structure your conversation around the GAINS acronym. GAINS stands for:

• Goals
• Accomplishments
• Interests
• Networks
• Skills.

Use this as a framework for your discussion and you will find out the most valuable and useful information about the other party. (You may also find GAINS to be useful in any business interview situation: a new employee, a new client, etc.) You want to end each 1-to-1 meeting with a clearer picture of how you can bring good business referrals to the other party.

The third suggestion is that you should end each 1-to-1 meeting with a commitment. This may be to refer someone to the other person, or it may be to follow up with another 1-to-1 meeting to find out more about your partner before attempting to make a good referral. Or, if the meeting was focussed on just one party, agree to meet again with the other in the spotlight. It doesn’t matter what you are going to do, as long as you’re going to do something as a result of your meeting. If you don’t come away with an action plan, did you really accomplish anything, or were you just catching up on gossip?

The fourth, and final, suggestion is that a 1-to-1 meeting is not a one-time event. You should go back periodically (every six months, say) and do another 1-to-1 with all the people in your close network, to deepen your relationships and find out more about why and how to refer business to them. Your business is not static. Neither is theirs. You need to keep up to date.

Action this week! Arrange a one-hour meeting with someone in your network that you want to get to know better. Spend the first half-hour asking questions but mostly listening (it’s all about them, remember). Then switch roles for the second half-hour. Use the GAINS structure and end the conversation with a follow-up action plan. Stick to the two half-hour timetable to keep the discussions focussed.

Go 1-to-1 and turn contacts into connections, and then into business referrals.

This article is similar to an educational talk I gave at a BNI Premier networking breakfast. It is based on material supplied by BNI.